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THE WEEK Jan 15: Right man for job

Updated: 2016-01-15
By THE WEEK (chinadaily.com.cn)

Chinese Powerball tricks

Our first story is related to America's soaring lottery powerball which has now reached $1.3 billion dollars. Here in China, lottery winners are offering sound advice to whoever gets lucky and takes home the jackpot. Ok, here's what you do after winning. Find a mascot at your local university or pro sports team, heck, it could be anything, all you need is a mascot head. Tell them you'll pay them back for it, but don't tell them how. With your winning ticket in hand, put on your mascot helmet and go claim that big check! No seriously, that's the thing to do in China, it helps you stay anonymous that way nobody will know you won. So the next time you win on that lottery ticket, you could wear the panda suit, The creepy Baby mask, The rooobot mask, or whatever this thing is. It's up to you, and if you're worried about humiliating yourself, don't, because your rich!

Brick wall driving test

Things were looking good for this Changsha woman. She studied, and studied, and studied, before acing the written part of her driver's test. Memorization is key! So up next was driving, her last step before getting that prestigious Chinese driver's license. She was all set, the keys were in the ignition, the car was rolling, then she hit the accelerator and drove right through a brick wall. Apparently, the Changsha woman thought the gas pedal was the brake pedal and that's what caused the car to drive through a brick wall. I guess that's not a question on the written exam. But nonetheless, the woman will be back, she will get her license. Soon, she will be coming to a brick wall near you!

Right man for job

Finally, after luxury brand company Louis Vuitton's extensive search through the entire planet to find the perfect model for their spring/summer 2016 women's wear campaign, they have finally found the perfect match. It's non other than the son of Will Smith, a 17-year-old boy named Jaden Smith. Yes, the face of Louis Vuitton's new women's wear campaign is a 17-year-old boy. What? This news comes only one year after Jaden was named the Most Stylish Man Alive by GQ Magazine. When he was asked you his style icons were, Smith said it was Batman, Robin, Nightwing, Superman, and Kanye West. We just received word that the candidate Jaden beat out for this spot is non-other than Miss Columbia… or was it Miss Philippines…. I don't know, let's all just hope that this is an honest human mistake.


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